Tuesday, December 30
it is so very easy to walk away from God.
it takes just a moment.
all we have to do is close the door in our hearts, turn our backs and walk away.
most believers have walked away at one point or another...
i believe the most prevalent reason is that we became disappointed, disillusioned and eventually, bitter.
the most painful times in my walk with Abba Father have occurred when i cry out desperately for a particular prayer to be answered and though reassured i am asking in accordance with His Will, and reassured by my closest friends that God can do anything...that nothing is impossible for God ~
He says no.
just like that.
not "NEVER"
but no for now...
or sometimes He says "soon" (which as Abba knows, is incredibly frustrating to hear!)
perhaps we're in a failing marriage and have decided to stay committed, our feet rooted to the floor of our home, determined to hold on and wait for God to refresh and rejuvenate our relationship.
we won't run away.
until...
the pain keeps building and building and building and in our pain, from the gaping wound we call our marriage, when we fall, gasping for breath, in anger we refuse the hand God extends to pull us back up.
maybe because we know God will give us the ability to endure and endure some more.
and we become tired of the pain, we become frustrated and then the words we thought we would never say,
bubble to the surface:
NO MORE!
we feel we can't and don't want to hold on...
we are tired of praying for the same thing when nothing seems to change.
and we know that our Abba Father is going to say, "hold on..."
and those are the words we can no longer bear to hear.
we all wonder why God says no or nothing at all, during real times of crisis.
we wonder where He is,
did He take a vacation?
or is He there but just doesn't care enough about our pain to help us?
and in our pain and bitterness over our desperate, (seemingly) unanswered prayers,
we walk away from the Father who doesn't seem to care enough to help us in the worst times of our lives.
so we close the door.
we say it's over
maybe we say "screw you!"
and just like that,
it's over.
and we walk away...
(i love that line in "Bruce Almighty" where he yells at God and tells Him that He could fix all of his problems in 5 minutes...
i think i've actually said that to God before!)
on some level, we know that going back to God means more pain, more trials and we don't want to willingly suffer anymore.
and honestly, that's the truth.
that to be a Christian means there will be suffering for His sake...because we've chosen to "drink from the same cup" as Jesus did...
the cup of sorrow and sacrifice...
it means facing rejection from the world and ferocious persecution from satan.
it means bearing our own crosses so that we can follow in the precious footsteps of Jesus.
loving and talking and spending time with our Abba Father is so priceless yet it is so costly at the same time.
our walk with Him, eschewing the world and satan, staying close to His side, following His Word
and making ourselves vulnerable and accessible to Jesus and the Holy Spirit ~
just plain sucks sometimes.
it hurts.
the very moment we ask Jesus into our hearts and lives, to be our Lord and Savior,
is just like painting a red bulls eye on our front and back.
we are instantly a target for satan and his legions of demoniac followers.
he hates us beyond anything we can imagine and it is his sole aim to destroy us all.
to make sure we stay very far away from God.
to make us incapable of hoping anymore...of believing anymore.
we are prey, to put it plainly.
and until we all go Home, that never changes...
so, okay, following after God/Jesus/Holy Spirit, can really suck sometimes...it can feel as if we're dying in the moment and as if He doesn't hear us or care enough about us to truly help us when we cry out in desperation.
but can i tell you something else?
whatever pain we endure here, is truly not even comparable to the pain and suffering Jesus endured on the Cross for us.
so great is His undying Love...
loving God, staying by His side, keeping our little hand in His is also the only reason worth living for.
i love my children beyond description or explanation, and my Ma and Dad and my sisters, my lil petey, ttt, shawnzy, my god-children and jeff.
i love them above any others on this planet.
but...
here's the difference between loving them all and loving God:
i can't survive without God...
don't mistake me, i have lost so many loved ones and there have been times i could barely get my feet out of bed and i just didn't want to go on living without that person...
but our Abba Father gave me the will and the strength to go on living without them...
He saved me.
(especially after ernzy's death, when i truly wasn't 'making it' at all).
i can live without my loved ones, though i pray that won't happen any time soon or at all...
but i simply cannot live without God.
i wouldn't even want to try...
He is the only One who makes sense out of my life.
He is the reason i go on.
He makes it possible for me to love and care for all the people in my life.
He gives me hope for tomorrow
and peace for today.
i cannot live without God.
so, my dear nomadic friends,
if you have walked away from God, i know you feel a void that can only be filled by Him.
i know you miss Him.
you miss the closeness you had with Him on a daily basis.
i know it.
i know it because every time i've given up on Him, the emptiness i felt was vast and endless.
and you know that you will never have peace again until you return to Him.
no matter if you have attempted to fill yourself up with things or people that the world deems "happiness"...
no matter if you've convinced yourself that living without Him is the right choice.
you know it is not.
come back, dearest friends, come back...
though you may feel as if it's too late or you've done too much damage to yourselves and others ~
it's not too late.
start the new year on Holy footing...
choose Him, for you know He has chosen you.
we can technically survive without God,
but then again, that's not really living, is it?
God
loves
you...
the only question left is,
do you love Him?
it takes just a moment.
all we have to do is close the door in our hearts, turn our backs and walk away.
most believers have walked away at one point or another...
i believe the most prevalent reason is that we became disappointed, disillusioned and eventually, bitter.
the most painful times in my walk with Abba Father have occurred when i cry out desperately for a particular prayer to be answered and though reassured i am asking in accordance with His Will, and reassured by my closest friends that God can do anything...that nothing is impossible for God ~
He says no.
just like that.
not "NEVER"
but no for now...
or sometimes He says "soon" (which as Abba knows, is incredibly frustrating to hear!)
perhaps we're in a failing marriage and have decided to stay committed, our feet rooted to the floor of our home, determined to hold on and wait for God to refresh and rejuvenate our relationship.
we won't run away.
until...
the pain keeps building and building and building and in our pain, from the gaping wound we call our marriage, when we fall, gasping for breath, in anger we refuse the hand God extends to pull us back up.
maybe because we know God will give us the ability to endure and endure some more.
and we become tired of the pain, we become frustrated and then the words we thought we would never say,
bubble to the surface:
NO MORE!
we feel we can't and don't want to hold on...
we are tired of praying for the same thing when nothing seems to change.
and we know that our Abba Father is going to say, "hold on..."
and those are the words we can no longer bear to hear.
we all wonder why God says no or nothing at all, during real times of crisis.
we wonder where He is,
did He take a vacation?
or is He there but just doesn't care enough about our pain to help us?
and in our pain and bitterness over our desperate, (seemingly) unanswered prayers,
we walk away from the Father who doesn't seem to care enough to help us in the worst times of our lives.
so we close the door.
we say it's over
maybe we say "screw you!"
and just like that,
it's over.
and we walk away...
(i love that line in "Bruce Almighty" where he yells at God and tells Him that He could fix all of his problems in 5 minutes...
i think i've actually said that to God before!)
on some level, we know that going back to God means more pain, more trials and we don't want to willingly suffer anymore.
and honestly, that's the truth.
that to be a Christian means there will be suffering for His sake...because we've chosen to "drink from the same cup" as Jesus did...
the cup of sorrow and sacrifice...
it means facing rejection from the world and ferocious persecution from satan.
it means bearing our own crosses so that we can follow in the precious footsteps of Jesus.
loving and talking and spending time with our Abba Father is so priceless yet it is so costly at the same time.
our walk with Him, eschewing the world and satan, staying close to His side, following His Word
and making ourselves vulnerable and accessible to Jesus and the Holy Spirit ~
just plain sucks sometimes.
it hurts.
the very moment we ask Jesus into our hearts and lives, to be our Lord and Savior,
is just like painting a red bulls eye on our front and back.
we are instantly a target for satan and his legions of demoniac followers.
he hates us beyond anything we can imagine and it is his sole aim to destroy us all.
to make sure we stay very far away from God.
to make us incapable of hoping anymore...of believing anymore.
we are prey, to put it plainly.
and until we all go Home, that never changes...
so, okay, following after God/Jesus/Holy Spirit, can really suck sometimes...it can feel as if we're dying in the moment and as if He doesn't hear us or care enough about us to truly help us when we cry out in desperation.
but can i tell you something else?
whatever pain we endure here, is truly not even comparable to the pain and suffering Jesus endured on the Cross for us.
so great is His undying Love...
loving God, staying by His side, keeping our little hand in His is also the only reason worth living for.
i love my children beyond description or explanation, and my Ma and Dad and my sisters, my lil petey, ttt, shawnzy, my god-children and jeff.
i love them above any others on this planet.
but...
here's the difference between loving them all and loving God:
i can't survive without God...
don't mistake me, i have lost so many loved ones and there have been times i could barely get my feet out of bed and i just didn't want to go on living without that person...
but our Abba Father gave me the will and the strength to go on living without them...
He saved me.
(especially after ernzy's death, when i truly wasn't 'making it' at all).
i can live without my loved ones, though i pray that won't happen any time soon or at all...
but i simply cannot live without God.
i wouldn't even want to try...
He is the only One who makes sense out of my life.
He is the reason i go on.
He makes it possible for me to love and care for all the people in my life.
He gives me hope for tomorrow
and peace for today.
i cannot live without God.
so, my dear nomadic friends,
if you have walked away from God, i know you feel a void that can only be filled by Him.
i know you miss Him.
you miss the closeness you had with Him on a daily basis.
i know it.
i know it because every time i've given up on Him, the emptiness i felt was vast and endless.
and you know that you will never have peace again until you return to Him.
no matter if you have attempted to fill yourself up with things or people that the world deems "happiness"...
no matter if you've convinced yourself that living without Him is the right choice.
you know it is not.
come back, dearest friends, come back...
though you may feel as if it's too late or you've done too much damage to yourselves and others ~
it's not too late.
start the new year on Holy footing...
choose Him, for you know He has chosen you.
we can technically survive without God,
but then again, that's not really living, is it?
God
loves
you...
the only question left is,
do you love Him?
Saturday, December 20
yesterday morning i woke up crying.
i had the worst dream about one of my daughters...
she was in a fire, badly burned and was dying because of it.
she knew she was dying and she tried to make it easier for me.
even though it hurt her, she smiled at me and said:
"it's okay, momma, we'll see each other again in Heaven."
i had the worst dream about one of my daughters...
she was in a fire, badly burned and was dying because of it.
she knew she was dying and she tried to make it easier for me.
even though it hurt her, she smiled at me and said:
"it's okay, momma, we'll see each other again in Heaven."
i woke up sobbing and was so glad it wasn't real
that i had to stumble down the hall to see her precious little face...
i could barely talk through my tears as i tried to explain i'd had a bad dream.
that i had to stumble down the hall to see her precious little face...
i could barely talk through my tears as i tried to explain i'd had a bad dream.
i just hugged her and told her over and over how much i loved her,
how much she meant to me...
the sad truth is
how much she meant to me...
the sad truth is
because we live, we also must die...
and though i understand with my mind that death is just a part of the cycle of life,
i've begun to hate death.
i hate it.
i hate loss.
i really do.
i hate the parting that comes between us all, in the moment we pass away from this world.
i hate the staggering pain.
the complete enormity of it all.
of being left behind.
of struggling beneath the agony just to get out of bed and keep going...
if you asked me what i look forward to most in Heaven,
(outside of spending eternity with my Abba Father, Brother Jesus and the precious Holy Spirit)
my answer is always the same:
Death will be no more.
no more loss.
the word "goodbye" will no longer be a part of our vocabulary,
and i will never again be left behind grieving for the people i've lost,
for stolen moments,
stolen years.
can you imagine a world without pain...without loss?
that is what awaits each child of God.
no more grief
no more sorrow
no more tears...
to know for once and for all,
that Life has won over Death,
that Good has won over Evil
that our precious Father has triumphed over Satan,
and the Holy War is over at long last.
and when Jesus returns, He'll say the most precious words:
let's go Home...
i love it.
i really do.
and though i understand with my mind that death is just a part of the cycle of life,
i've begun to hate death.
i hate it.
i hate loss.
i really do.
i hate the parting that comes between us all, in the moment we pass away from this world.
i hate the staggering pain.
the complete enormity of it all.
of being left behind.
of struggling beneath the agony just to get out of bed and keep going...
if you asked me what i look forward to most in Heaven,
(outside of spending eternity with my Abba Father, Brother Jesus and the precious Holy Spirit)
my answer is always the same:
Death will be no more.
no more loss.
the word "goodbye" will no longer be a part of our vocabulary,
and i will never again be left behind grieving for the people i've lost,
for stolen moments,
stolen years.
can you imagine a world without pain...without loss?
that is what awaits each child of God.
no more grief
no more sorrow
no more tears...
to know for once and for all,
that Life has won over Death,
that Good has won over Evil
that our precious Father has triumphed over Satan,
and the Holy War is over at long last.
and when Jesus returns, He'll say the most precious words:
let's go Home...
i love it.
i really do.
Saturday, November 29
last night i had the privilege of seeing the film Braveheart again...
i saw it last in 1998, fell in love with it and purchased it, but felt i couldn't watch it again because of the absolute heartache and suffering.
until last night...
when all my children were gone for the weekend,
and the house was peaceful and silent,
i watched it again.
William Ross Wallace is one of my heroes.
he lived, fought and bled for Scotland.
and more than that - for the belief that all men should be free...
that belief cost him his life...and gave Scotland theirs.
it seems freedom can only come with a price.
usually that price is the blood and sacrifice of all a person holds dear.
even as i write this, our men and women are dying right now to keep us free.
to keep our children and their children and their children ~ free.
the freedoms i can never imagine living without...
i cannot write the words to show how deeply grateful i am to each soldier, each soldier's wife or husband, each soldiers mother and father, for the freedoms i have right now...
William Ross Wallace is one of my heroes.
he lived, fought and bled for Scotland.
and more than that - for the belief that all men should be free...
that belief cost him his life...and gave Scotland theirs.
it seems freedom can only come with a price.
usually that price is the blood and sacrifice of all a person holds dear.
even as i write this, our men and women are dying right now to keep us free.
to keep our children and their children and their children ~ free.
the freedoms i can never imagine living without...
i cannot write the words to show how deeply grateful i am to each soldier, each soldier's wife or husband, each soldiers mother and father, for the freedoms i have right now...
for every wife or husband who learns their spouse will never come home again ~
thank you thank you thank you.
for every child who will grow to adulthood without their parent by their side ~
thank you thank you thank you.
for every mother and father who will never hold their child-soldier again ~
thank you thank you thank you.
you are all my 'braveheart'...
and though i have never deserved these freedoms i sit upon, i will never forget you...
i write your names upon my heart and these words upon my life.
there is another Braveheart.
He is the truest soldier i have ever known.
He has no medals.
no unmarked grave.
no flowers on Veteran's Day.
no flag upon His chest.
no government to stand beside
and His heroism is often overlooked and unsung...
this soldier is the Son of God.
He is Jesus Christ of Nazareth.
He bled and died upon the belief that all men should be free.
all of us.
each man, woman and child.
irrespective of country and home.
His life, His death, was each moment, for our freedom.
undeserved though we all remain
of His priceless mercy and love,
He came to "set the captives free",
to purchase our freedom at any cost to Himself.
every word from His lips, every drop from His blood
was given for you and me.
that freedom is for us all.
His life for ours.
and all we have to do is say one small word ~
yes.
yes.
yes.
what will you say to the King of Kings?
to the greatest soldier of all time?
each of us must decide.
i say yes to the greatest Braveheart i will ever know...
i say yes for freedom.
for my life,
for my children,
and for their children's freedom.
thank You, Jesus,
you are all my 'braveheart'...
and though i have never deserved these freedoms i sit upon, i will never forget you...
i write your names upon my heart and these words upon my life.
there is another Braveheart.
He is the truest soldier i have ever known.
He has no medals.
no unmarked grave.
no flowers on Veteran's Day.
no flag upon His chest.
no government to stand beside
and His heroism is often overlooked and unsung...
this soldier is the Son of God.
He is Jesus Christ of Nazareth.
He bled and died upon the belief that all men should be free.
all of us.
each man, woman and child.
irrespective of country and home.
His life, His death, was each moment, for our freedom.
undeserved though we all remain
of His priceless mercy and love,
He came to "set the captives free",
to purchase our freedom at any cost to Himself.
every word from His lips, every drop from His blood
was given for you and me.
that freedom is for us all.
His life for ours.
and all we have to do is say one small word ~
yes.
yes.
yes.
what will you say to the King of Kings?
to the greatest soldier of all time?
each of us must decide.
i say yes to the greatest Braveheart i will ever know...
i say yes for freedom.
for my life,
for my children,
and for their children's freedom.
thank You, Jesus,
for Your unfathomable Love,
Your incalculable sacrifice,
and for freeing us from sin and eternal darkness...
thank You
thank You
thank You
thank You...
"To say to the captives, 'Come out,'
and to those in darkness, 'Be free!'..."
~Isaiah 49:9~
"To give light to them that sit in darkness and in the shadow of death."
~Luke 1:49~
Friday, November 28
i love You so very much, my Father...
i love Your:
kindness
mercy
strength
patience
perserverance
grace and graciousness
healing
restoration
renewal
silence
power
protection
nurturing
serenity
serenity
peace
acceptance
hope
understanding
gentility
constant availability
creations ~ especially my lil petey and Your glorious rain!
forgivenessand unconditional Love in this very conditional world...
every single moment i'm alive is a gift from You and You alone.
my children, my greatest blessing, are directly from Your heart to mine.
and though i am a pauper in this world, i am a princess in Yours...
the Home You call Your own will one day be mine as well.
so, Father?
i
love
You
and more than that,
i
love
everything
about
You...
after all, what child could ever ask for more?
Tuesday, November 25
so many of us have experienced those life-changing moments when we realize a dream is about to die...
specifically, when the dream of our marriages die.
when the only seeming certainty is a pending divorce decree and the complete upheaval it brings with it.
what we once thought was our life is forever altered and the absolute shock and trauma of it can be staggering.
how do you let go of a dream that can never come true?
the only answer i've found to that question is God...
He is the only One who has everything we need to survive the death of a dream.
healing, restoration, protection, counsel, refreshment, encouragement, unconditional love and acceptance and most of all ~
hope.
our Abba Father gives us hope to carry on, to pick up the pieces of the broken pictures of our lives.
He gives us hope not only of healing and restoration, but the ability to still believe in Love...
that it exists.
that others have it.
that it takes faith to see it
and work to keep it.
that Love alone, is possible.
that 'this too shall pass'
that the pain gets less
that hope does 'spring anew'
that life hasn't passed you by
there's more and more.
that the children will heal as well...given time.
that trusting someone doesn't always end in grief...in sorrow.
Love is possible.
did you know?
do you believe it?
are you hurting?
are you learning the painful lesson of letting go?
that we don't always get what we want because we don't always know what we need?
that your divorce doesn't define you?
that life can shine most beautifully when it comes after death?
that this isn't the end of your story, just the closing of a chapter?
Love is possible.
whereever you are today, please know that each day, each moment is a brand new beginning.
you can start again.
you can be the proverbial Phoenix that rises from the ashes.
you can be the blossoming of Spring.
you can be whole.
you can be new.
you can truly live again,
but most of all...
you can love again.
because
Love
is
possible...
specifically, when the dream of our marriages die.
when the only seeming certainty is a pending divorce decree and the complete upheaval it brings with it.
what we once thought was our life is forever altered and the absolute shock and trauma of it can be staggering.
how do you let go of a dream that can never come true?
the only answer i've found to that question is God...
He is the only One who has everything we need to survive the death of a dream.
healing, restoration, protection, counsel, refreshment, encouragement, unconditional love and acceptance and most of all ~
hope.
our Abba Father gives us hope to carry on, to pick up the pieces of the broken pictures of our lives.
He gives us hope not only of healing and restoration, but the ability to still believe in Love...
that it exists.
that others have it.
that it takes faith to see it
and work to keep it.
that Love alone, is possible.
that 'this too shall pass'
that the pain gets less
that hope does 'spring anew'
that life hasn't passed you by
there's more and more.
that the children will heal as well...given time.
that trusting someone doesn't always end in grief...in sorrow.
Love is possible.
did you know?
do you believe it?
are you hurting?
are you learning the painful lesson of letting go?
that we don't always get what we want because we don't always know what we need?
that your divorce doesn't define you?
that life can shine most beautifully when it comes after death?
that this isn't the end of your story, just the closing of a chapter?
Love is possible.
whereever you are today, please know that each day, each moment is a brand new beginning.
you can start again.
you can be the proverbial Phoenix that rises from the ashes.
you can be the blossoming of Spring.
you can be whole.
you can be new.
you can truly live again,
but most of all...
you can love again.
because
Love
is
possible...
Wednesday, November 19
Happy Birthday, Ernzy.
i love and miss you, ernzy...
no matter how much time passes by, i love and miss you just the same.
i want to pick up the phone and sing you Happy Birthday like i have done for years, and hear your voice just once more.
i wish you were here, ernzy...
i wish i could hug you and tell you how much you truly mean to me.
i wish i could have taken all of your pain away.
Christmas Eve is coming soon, ernzy...
did you know that your absence has changed everything?
that Thanksgiving and especially Christmas Eve, are forever different because you are no longer here?
mom and dad brought you flowers and balloons for your birthday, ernzy...
we celebrate your life even more especially because you aren't here to share it with us.
Happy Birthday, precious ernzy...
we celebrate you.
Monday, November 17
Happy Birthday, precious Ma...
you are so very precious to all of those around you.
your life is a blessing, Ma.
i'm blessed to know and love you.
i know your birthday is hard without your little boy...
i know you ache for him.
but your life is truly worth celebrating
because you are more than a survivor,
you are a champion.
you're my personal hero, Ma...
i'm proud of who you are and how much you love your family and friends.
your random acts of kindness and thoughtfulness mean the world
to the ones you bless.
i am one of those, Ma.
thank you just for being who you are...
and Happy, Happy Birthday to you!
your life shines upon us all...
Wednesday, November 12
"Then all of Jesus' followers left him and ran away."
Mark 14:50
KEY THOUGHT:
For me, this is one of the saddest verses in all the Bible.
Jesus is completely left alone by those whom he had loved, trained, warned, and prepared.
The Son of God will now face the pent-up fury of those who have hated him.
He will bear unspeakable brutality and have no one to stand with him in his time of agony.
He will die alone.
Because he has faced abandonment, we can rest assured that he knows how we feel when we are abandoned, betrayed, and abused.
However, because Jesus died alone, he has promised us we would never be abandoned.
He promises to be with us every step of the way.
TODAY'S PRAYER:
Father, in those times that I feel most alone and abandoned, please help me remember Jesus
and realize that he not only knows those feelings of abandonment,
but he also has promised to never abandon me.
Thank you for this assurance based on such a costly sacrifice.
In Jesus' name I thank you.
Amen.
(this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org.)
Mark 14:50
KEY THOUGHT:
For me, this is one of the saddest verses in all the Bible.
Jesus is completely left alone by those whom he had loved, trained, warned, and prepared.
The Son of God will now face the pent-up fury of those who have hated him.
He will bear unspeakable brutality and have no one to stand with him in his time of agony.
He will die alone.
Because he has faced abandonment, we can rest assured that he knows how we feel when we are abandoned, betrayed, and abused.
However, because Jesus died alone, he has promised us we would never be abandoned.
He promises to be with us every step of the way.
TODAY'S PRAYER:
Father, in those times that I feel most alone and abandoned, please help me remember Jesus
and realize that he not only knows those feelings of abandonment,
but he also has promised to never abandon me.
Thank you for this assurance based on such a costly sacrifice.
In Jesus' name I thank you.
Amen.
(this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org.)
Sunday, November 9
thank You, my Abba Father,
for all You are and all You've done...
Your beauty is everywhere.
Your grace covers me each day.
Your Love lifts me from my daily troubles and enfolds me in the safety of Your arms.
i live for You, my Abba...
everything beautiful in my life is because of You and You alone.
all the Glory and credit belongs to You.
thank You for my children, Father...they truly fill my heart with light and i will love them for always and always.
thank You for my lil Petey...he brings me joy, companionship and i love him so.
thank You for Ma & Dad, J, my sisters and friends...they are simply precious and irreplaceable.
i don't have an eloquent speech prepared or a beautified prayer...just these 3 words:
"thank You, Father"
and knowing You, dearest Abba, that is enough...
Sunday, November 2
last night i had the rare opportunity of re-connecting with someone that has always been dear to me...
we were able to spend a good chunk of time getting to know a part of what has happened in each of our lives over the last 20 or so years.
he is a wonderful person, friend, brother, son and man ~
and i am blessed to have him, once again, in my life.
and i am blessed to have him, once again, in my life.
he earnestly cares for his family and friends and in general, he loves people.
he 'walks unafraid' in this life and it's truly refreshing to know someone like this.
he 'walks unafraid' in this life and it's truly refreshing to know someone like this.
because tomorrow is not promised to any of us, i do my best to live fully in the moment, to give myself wholly to right now.
and right now i am just grateful to my Abba Father for the extra joy i have in my heart.
so...
J, thank you for who you are and for the delight last night was...i am blessed to know and care about you.
and as always, Father, thank You for all You are and do in my life...
i am proud and blessed beyond measure to always be Your laineyrose.
i am proud and blessed beyond measure to always be Your laineyrose.
Saturday, October 18
What would Jesus say when the Dow swings nearly 1,000 points in one day?
I'm not sure, but this is my take on it...
"You know I love you.
Your value has not changed one bit, no matter what's happened to your market accounts.
The downturn in the market can remind you of something I have often said:
'This world is not your home.'
Not long ago people would store up their treasures in barns where moth and rust could destroy.
Your investments are a little more high-tech, but not so much different in some ways.
You're not worried about moths or rust, you're worried about uncertainty and sudden downswings
you cannot control.
Like the scriptures say, cast all your anxieties on me because I love you.
Maybe that means something more to you today than ever before.
If so, that's a good thing!"
As the market goes up and down, always know that my love for you never changes.
In other words, let my love be the most important factor in your mindset and attitude,
not what Fox News or CNN is reporting.
My love will bring comfort to your soul.
I know you're stressed-out.
Faithful people have faced terrible circumstances many times over the years.
Just keep your eyes focused on me and my Father's will.
"Most financial analysts are exactly right when they say 'focus on the long term.'
This is a principle my Father's Word has been teaching for generations.
Much tragedy occurs when people make rash decisions, when they get carried away with 'short-term crisis.
'I've seen people take harsh measures and make terrible decisions because they could only seethe moment.
Focus on all the promises for eternity.
That will make huge difference today!
Let the current market crisis help you re-frame your thinking with respect to the future.
My Father wants us to look past the short term and focus on a more distant horizon.
And that horizon depends wholly on His will.
The future depends on the Father's love and plans, not on the Dow Jones.
No matter what happens today or tomorrow, His plans are to give you a hope and a future
of calling on His name and finding Him.
"There are so many things I could say, many things I have already said in The Word.
Go there and spend more time with me.
What if the biggest gain you make in the midst of all these market losses is a new walk with me and my Father? That would be wonderful, huh?!
Just think of how much better off you'll be, no matter what happens with your portfolio.
But let me say this: I think you'll be fine.
I hope your financial security makes a rebound.
Over the years much good has been done in this world by prospered people who have gotten
their priorities in order.
Perhaps my father is preparing you for the greatest opportunities of your life.
I hope so."In the meantime, don't ever forget this:
I love you no matter what.And no matter what occurs today or tomorrow, your value will never change."
Thursday, October 16
"I was walking through the Atlanta airport, CNN blaring in the background,
headlines screaming from the news stands stocked with magazines
covered with glum faces, all the news is bad, bad, bad.
You can't help but worry and wonder what the future will hold, what your retirement will be like,
what will be left over when all the dust settles.
Then I saw her.
She was about 8 years old and a darling little girl.
She was with her mother and father and older brother.
She was also on crutches.
Her legs barely made a ripple in her little jeans, obviously withered and weak from some
chromosome that came unraveled while she was being knitted in the womb.
She was happy, and swung her legs in a strong rhythmic motion with her crutches to keep pace
with her parents and brother.
She was in every way a typical 8 year-old except for her withered extremities.
I thought that no matter where the stock market ends up, or how the economy falls or rises,
she will still be crippled.
She will grow up in a world where a pair of shorts will be a cause for people to stare.
She'll feel left out as other kids run and play at school, and she will struggle to find a formal dress for the Homecoming dance that will accommodate her braced legs and crutches.
It's too early to fold, and we're made of better stuff!
No matter if my 401(k) recovers or not, she will always -- always -- be crippled.
Her parents may lose their job, I might lose mine, but she will never lose her infirmity.
We may all weather this storm with nothing more than a few fallen limbs in the yard, but her limbs
will never be whole.
It made me a little angry that we have been focused on what we lost, not what we have.
I remember Sam Walton, after the 1987 crash, when he said that even after watching Wal-Mart stock fall by a third, he still had the same number of shirts on the shelves as he did the day before.
That is the kind of thinking, the kind of investing, and the kind of courage we need now.
The losses are paper losses.
The value is still there in the companies the stocks represent.
If we will each keep our head in this mess, we'll work through this.
That really is what the little girl does.
She marches through the airport like she had every right to be there, withered legs and all.
No sympathy, no melancholy, just the spirit and spunk to deal with the hand she was dealt.
We need to take a deep breath and get ready to play the game.
It's too early to fold, and we're made of better stuff ~
the same kind of stuff of which that little girl is made."
(c) 2008 Rob Frazier
~this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org~
Saturday, October 11
in the last 5 years, i have lost almost everyone i've ever loved...
one day here, the next just gone.
i've prayed, fasted, believed and hoped for miracles...yet not one has returned to both Abba and me.
i've made huge mistakes and asked for a forgiveness that i did not deserve.
i've stumbled and fallen and it has been God alone who has saved me from the great abyss.
what i've learned in this time, in the 'valley of God' is this:
God will never leave or forsake me
i cannot earn or ever deserve, His Love, Grace and Forgiveness
He is with me at all times, in all places
though i have been forsaken by those i've loved, He would never do the same to me
He would never do the same to you
i have to hold on despite seeming like a ridiculous, modern-day noah
and most of all...
nothing is impossible with God ~ absolutely nothing.
dearest Abba,
save and forgive me from my terrible foolishness, huge mistakes and the doubts that assail me daily...
i am nothing without You, my King of Kings.
i have no future without you...my only future is You.
You are the only One that makes my life make sense...
with all the love i possess ~ Your most unworthy daughter,
Your laineyrose
Friday, October 10
"And I will deliver thee out of the hand of the wicked, and I will redeem thee out of the hand of the terrible." ~Jeremiah 15:21~
Note the glorious personality of the promise.
I will, I will.
The Lord Jehovah himself interposes to deliver and redeem his people.
He pledges himself personally to rescue them.
His own arm shall do it, that he may have the glory.
Here is not a word said of any effort of our own which may be needed to assist the Lord.
Neither our strength nor our weakness is taken into the account, but the lone I, like the sun in the heavens, shines out resplendent in all-sufficiency.
Why then do we calculate our forces, and consult with flesh and blood to our grievous wounding?
Jehovah has power enough without borrowing from our puny arm.
Peace, ye unbelieving thoughts, be still, and know that the Lord reigneth.
Nor is there a hint concerning secondary means and causes.
The Lord says nothing of friends and helpers:
he undertakes the work alone, and feels no need of human arms to aid him.
Vain are all our lookings around to companions and relatives;
they are broken reeds if we lean upon them-often unwilling when able, and unable when they are willing.
Since the promise comes alone from God, it would be well to wait only upon him;
and when we do so, our expectation never fails us.
Who are the wicked that we should fear them?
The Lord will utterly consume them;they are to be pitied rather than feared.
As for terrible ones, they are only terrors to those who have no God to fly to, for when the Lord
is on our side, whom shall we fear?
If we run into sin to please the wicked, we have cause to be alarmed, but if we hold fast our integrity,
the rage of tyrants shall be overruled for our good.
When the fish swallowed Jonah, he found him a morsel which he could not digest;
and when the world devours the church, it is glad to be rid of it again.
In all times of fiery trial, in patience let us possess our souls.
~Other Charles Spurgeon's devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org.~
Monday, September 29
my lil mini-doxie, petey, is the love of my life...
he is my best friend and i love him beyond thought or measure.
a week ago yesterday i had to bring him into pet ER clinic for a small infection.
i thought i was losing him and was absolutely devastated...
the antibiotics were finished yesterday and then last night he swallowed a small portion of sport's tape from my girls' bedroom floor.
the tape can hurt his digestive track and cause an infection...
they wanted me to bring in petey but i can't afford it -
(it cost me $244.00 to take him to the pet ER clinic last sunday)
if he starts the 'v' word or the 'd' word (sorry, i hate both of those words) he has to be seen immediately.
he has to be watched carefully for the next week...
now i will be afraid of losing him for another week and after speaking to the nurse over the phone,
i just cried and cried.
even if you don't know me, could you please say a prayer for petey?
i've lost too many people to lose my precious lil friend as well...
thank you for listening and for any prayers you offer up on me and petey's behalf...
may God bless you all,
laineyrose
Saturday, September 27
Stressed Out,
by Patrick D. Odum
by Patrick D. Odum
"So do not worry, saying, "What shall we eat?" or "What shall we drink?" or "What shall we wear?"
For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.
Each day has enough trouble of its own."
(Matthew 6:31-34 TNIV)
Please pardon me if I seem a little stressed out.
I really can't help it.
After all, I apparently live in the most stressful city in America.
Yes, Chicago was recently named in an article by "Forbes Magazine" as the most stressful place
in the United States to live.
Forbes based their evaluation on several factors, including air quality, unemployment rate, the cost of housing
and gas, and population density.
Chicago scored high enough in all these categories to push our lovely city past New York, Detroit, Los Angeles,
and San Francisco and claim the title of "Most Stressful Place in America."
Whoo-hoo! We're number one.
Actually, it could have been worse.
The "Forbes" article based its conclusions in part on the fact that gas in Chicago costs "a nickel under four dollars." Those were the days.
Funny thing, though.
I've lived in Chicago for seventeen years and, aside from a little high blood pressure, I'm in pretty good health.
You'd think all that time living in the most stressful city in America would have taken more of a toll.
In fact, I know lots of people who live in other places who seem to have at least as much stress in their
lives as I do, if not more.
And I'm sure there are places in other parts of the world that make Chicago look about as stressful as a quiet tropical island.
Though we use it to refer to almost anything that makes us worried or anxious,
the word stress originally described "the non-specific response of the body to any demand for change."
In other words, stress is the general symptoms we feel when things don't go as we planned.
It's what happens to us when we're forced to adjust on the fly.
If that's what stress is, then I think we're left with an inescapable conclusion.
We can't avoid stress.
I know, I know.
You're welcome.
Look, I'm with you;
I think I might enjoy a life in which the only stress I had was deciding whether to have crab or steak for dinner.
I've come to the conclusion, however, that God hasn't seen fit to give me that life.
I'm pretty sure that isn't your life, either.
In fact, I'm pretty sure that's no one's life.
If stress is the body's response to any demand for change, then short of having absolute and complete control of your life, and the lives of those around you, stress is inescapable.
Stuff will happen to you that you hadn't planned for.
Stuff will happen to you that you might have planned for, but sooner than you planned.
Stuff will happen to you that you planned for, and you'll find that your plans don't cover it.
Or if it's not you this week, it will be someone you love, and that person's stress will cause you stress.
We might as well stop being surprised when unexpected things happen.
We might as well recognize the stress we feel for what it is:
a biological reaction to the upsetting of our apple carts.
Be it a lane closure or a foreclosure, the birth of a baby or the death of a parent, starting a new job
or getting fired, marriage problems or dating problems.
Something happens that demands change, or adaptation, or fight, or flight, and our bodies amp up
the energy level and take stock of options.
Not just in Chicago, or even especially in Chicago.
Anywhere.
Everywhere.
Jesus suggests that we focus our energies on seeking God.
I think a lot of what we call stress is really worry, and what we usually worry about are the things
we can't do much else about.
It's funny how we are, really;
we worry most about what we can do the least about.
Somehow, though, we seem to be under the impression that by obsessing over it and fretting about it,
lying awake all night turning it over in our heads, and driving everyone we know crazy endlessly retelling
and rehashing it, we can somehow solve it.
That's why we don't like it that Jesus seems dismissive of the things that stress us.
"Don't worry," he says, and being wired the way we are it's little wonder that our knee-jerk response
is something along the lines of, "Yeah, right."
But don't tune him out, because what he suggests is that worry is a theological problem.
We worry, he claims, because the God we believe in isn't powerful enough or loving enough or concerned enough
to watch over us.
Thankfully, he reminds us that the God we're supposed to believe in is our "heavenly Father,"
and that he cares for his children.
Jesus suggests that we learn some life lessons from the birds and the grass.
Neither are strong in the area of strategic, long-range planning.
Yet, by and large, God cares for them.
The birds seem to have all they need to eat.
The grass is clothed in flowers as bright as the finery of a king.
They go about their business, they do what they do and live their lives, and God cares for them.
"Are you not much more valuable to God?"
Jesus asks us – who are made in his image, shaped by his hands, animated by his breath.
"Don't you think your Father in heaven will care for you at least that well?"
Worry, Jesus says, is the response of pagans to a world that's out of their control.
The response of believers is faith in a God who knows exactly what we need and is happy to provide it.
The response of believers is prayer: to give thanks for his care in the past and ask for it
to continue in the present and future.
Instead of worry, Jesus suggests that we focus our energies on seeking God:
his reign over our hearts and lives, his righteousness lived out in what we do and say.
It's kind of a nice way, I think, of telling us to just try to do what God says and be the people he made us to be, and leave the planning to him.
That's scary, for some us.
For all of us, to an extent.
Then again, there's something attractive about it, too.
To live with joy and expectation and trust, instead of anxiety, worry, and gloom?
We can.
We have every reason to live that way.
Leave worry to those who don't know our Father in heaven.
That's not for us.
The God we know cares for the birds and the grass and loves us even more.
So much, in fact, that he didn't even withhold his Son from us.
Trust his power and love, seek his presence and his will above everything else, and you'll be ready
to deal with any kind of stress life may have in store for you.
Why, you could even live in Chicago.
(c) 2008 Patrick D. Odum
~this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org~
For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.
Each day has enough trouble of its own."
(Matthew 6:31-34 TNIV)
Please pardon me if I seem a little stressed out.
I really can't help it.
After all, I apparently live in the most stressful city in America.
Yes, Chicago was recently named in an article by "Forbes Magazine" as the most stressful place
in the United States to live.
Forbes based their evaluation on several factors, including air quality, unemployment rate, the cost of housing
and gas, and population density.
Chicago scored high enough in all these categories to push our lovely city past New York, Detroit, Los Angeles,
and San Francisco and claim the title of "Most Stressful Place in America."
Whoo-hoo! We're number one.
Actually, it could have been worse.
The "Forbes" article based its conclusions in part on the fact that gas in Chicago costs "a nickel under four dollars." Those were the days.
Funny thing, though.
I've lived in Chicago for seventeen years and, aside from a little high blood pressure, I'm in pretty good health.
You'd think all that time living in the most stressful city in America would have taken more of a toll.
In fact, I know lots of people who live in other places who seem to have at least as much stress in their
lives as I do, if not more.
And I'm sure there are places in other parts of the world that make Chicago look about as stressful as a quiet tropical island.
Though we use it to refer to almost anything that makes us worried or anxious,
the word stress originally described "the non-specific response of the body to any demand for change."
In other words, stress is the general symptoms we feel when things don't go as we planned.
It's what happens to us when we're forced to adjust on the fly.
If that's what stress is, then I think we're left with an inescapable conclusion.
We can't avoid stress.
I know, I know.
You're welcome.
Look, I'm with you;
I think I might enjoy a life in which the only stress I had was deciding whether to have crab or steak for dinner.
I've come to the conclusion, however, that God hasn't seen fit to give me that life.
I'm pretty sure that isn't your life, either.
In fact, I'm pretty sure that's no one's life.
If stress is the body's response to any demand for change, then short of having absolute and complete control of your life, and the lives of those around you, stress is inescapable.
Stuff will happen to you that you hadn't planned for.
Stuff will happen to you that you might have planned for, but sooner than you planned.
Stuff will happen to you that you planned for, and you'll find that your plans don't cover it.
Or if it's not you this week, it will be someone you love, and that person's stress will cause you stress.
We might as well stop being surprised when unexpected things happen.
We might as well recognize the stress we feel for what it is:
a biological reaction to the upsetting of our apple carts.
Be it a lane closure or a foreclosure, the birth of a baby or the death of a parent, starting a new job
or getting fired, marriage problems or dating problems.
Something happens that demands change, or adaptation, or fight, or flight, and our bodies amp up
the energy level and take stock of options.
Not just in Chicago, or even especially in Chicago.
Anywhere.
Everywhere.
Jesus suggests that we focus our energies on seeking God.
I think a lot of what we call stress is really worry, and what we usually worry about are the things
we can't do much else about.
It's funny how we are, really;
we worry most about what we can do the least about.
Somehow, though, we seem to be under the impression that by obsessing over it and fretting about it,
lying awake all night turning it over in our heads, and driving everyone we know crazy endlessly retelling
and rehashing it, we can somehow solve it.
That's why we don't like it that Jesus seems dismissive of the things that stress us.
"Don't worry," he says, and being wired the way we are it's little wonder that our knee-jerk response
is something along the lines of, "Yeah, right."
But don't tune him out, because what he suggests is that worry is a theological problem.
We worry, he claims, because the God we believe in isn't powerful enough or loving enough or concerned enough
to watch over us.
Thankfully, he reminds us that the God we're supposed to believe in is our "heavenly Father,"
and that he cares for his children.
Jesus suggests that we learn some life lessons from the birds and the grass.
Neither are strong in the area of strategic, long-range planning.
Yet, by and large, God cares for them.
The birds seem to have all they need to eat.
The grass is clothed in flowers as bright as the finery of a king.
They go about their business, they do what they do and live their lives, and God cares for them.
"Are you not much more valuable to God?"
Jesus asks us – who are made in his image, shaped by his hands, animated by his breath.
"Don't you think your Father in heaven will care for you at least that well?"
Worry, Jesus says, is the response of pagans to a world that's out of their control.
The response of believers is faith in a God who knows exactly what we need and is happy to provide it.
The response of believers is prayer: to give thanks for his care in the past and ask for it
to continue in the present and future.
Instead of worry, Jesus suggests that we focus our energies on seeking God:
his reign over our hearts and lives, his righteousness lived out in what we do and say.
It's kind of a nice way, I think, of telling us to just try to do what God says and be the people he made us to be, and leave the planning to him.
That's scary, for some us.
For all of us, to an extent.
Then again, there's something attractive about it, too.
To live with joy and expectation and trust, instead of anxiety, worry, and gloom?
We can.
We have every reason to live that way.
Leave worry to those who don't know our Father in heaven.
That's not for us.
The God we know cares for the birds and the grass and loves us even more.
So much, in fact, that he didn't even withhold his Son from us.
Trust his power and love, seek his presence and his will above everything else, and you'll be ready
to deal with any kind of stress life may have in store for you.
Why, you could even live in Chicago.
(c) 2008 Patrick D. Odum
~this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org~
Saturday, September 20
VERSE:
"But what about you?" he asked.
"Who do you say I am?"
Peter answered, "The Christ of God."
~Luke 9:20~
THOUGHT:
A lot of people have their opinions about Jesus’ identity.
The real issue, however, is what you believe about Jesus.
What you decide about God’s Son means everything for you and for those you influence.
So listen to Jesus' question to his disciples as if he is asking it of you: "Who do you say I am?"
I pray that your answer is the same as Peter’s:
“You are the Messiah, the Son of God.”
PRAYER:
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for Jesus, who is my Lord, Savior, friend, and older brother in your family.
I praise you for sending him to reveal yourself to us and I thank you for your love demonstrated by him on the Cross.
I do believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the Living God, and the only Savior who can bring freedom, pardon, cleansing, and complete salvation.
Thank you!
In Jesus' mighty name I pray.
Amen.
~this and other devotions can be found at www.heartlight.org~
Friday, September 19
VERSE:
"Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to
everyone, to win as many as possible."
~1 Corinthians 9:19~
THOUGHT:
Grace frees us from the law of sin and death.
"Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to
everyone, to win as many as possible."
~1 Corinthians 9:19~
THOUGHT:
Grace frees us from the law of sin and death.
But, our freedom is not to be used for rebellion or for self-gratification.
Instead, we are to use our freedom redemptively, just as Jesus did
(cf. Philippians 2:5-11).
We can voluntarily limit that freedom to help others still caught in bondage
to sin and false ideas about God.
We can use the freedom of the Spirit to be transformed to be like
Christ (2 Corinthians 3:17-18).
Christ (2 Corinthians 3:17-18).
Let’s use our freedom to rejoice and to bless.
PRAYER:
Thank you, great and mighty LORD, for setting me free by your grace.
PRAYER:
Thank you, great and mighty LORD, for setting me free by your grace.
I know, dear Father, that this gift was given to me at great cost ~
the humiliating torture, death, and burial of your Son, Jesus Christ.
So use me, dear Father, to bless others who have not
yet found their deliverance and freedom in Jesus.
yet found their deliverance and freedom in Jesus.
I pray this in the name of my Savior, Jesus.
Amen.
~this and other devotions can be found at: www.heartlight.org~
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