rubbish...

 

i decided to try my hand at drawing...

they're probably total rubbish but they were soo much fun to do...

i don't mind that...

failing...

i just love the challenge of trying something new...

venturing out into unfamiliar waters...

i would like to say in my defense that they are much better in person!

i'd much rather put myself out there, 

try something i'm totally new at 

and if i fail at least i didn't tuck myself into a safe and cozy corner and say that is that.

i tell myself that that's not really living, is it?

that's not being brave, is it?

that is total rubbish..

we need to be brave today for tomorrow is promised to no one.

For Ernzy...

 each of us leave our mark on this world as we depart from it, changing events and the people around us whether we realize it or not.

i did not realize how indelibly imprinted i had become by my brother's life.
his love, unique laugh and sense of humor, his passion for music and his deepest desire to just be loved.
like the "butterfly effect" & "chaos theory", ernzy's actions, his "ripples in a pond" changed my life forever and i still cannot believe he is gone.

he was such a vibrant man...i wish you could have known him...i wish he would have stayed.
maybe one of the great lessons in all of this is to realize that whether we believe it or not...we all matter.
we all make a difference, for the better or for the worse...
and in the end it's important to understand that we all need each other to simply carry on.

if you can see this, ernzy, i love you so very, very, much, and i want you to know i know that you made a difference in this world...your life mattered here - and you matter still.

your life changed mine forever, ernzy...what a beautiful gift you will always be.

All I want for Christmas...

There's someone special i love...

i've known and loved him for 40 years...

but he's there and i'm over here...and he doesn't know how much i miss him.

he's gone quiet...silent and still...and i let him go...no calls or texts (save one), i just respected his silence and watched him drift away.

i think of him each and every day...thoughts i want to share, stories that would make him laugh and my sense of dorkiness that makes him smile.

he doesn't know about this blog, so i'll quietly say this to him here...

all i want for Christmas is you...

I'll be seeing you...

i'm so excited!...i'm going to Arizona on Nov 10th to stay with my best friend for about a week...i live far away from her in Washington State and we don't get to see each other very often!

I don't think i've mentioned before that i'm an amputee.  It's a BKA (below the knee amputation).  I get by just fine with a wheelchair and a prosthetic leg.  i'll be "on my leg" for as long as possible starting with my plane ride there...

my amazing twin daughters are scared for me....afraid people will be mean to me...they are so adorable!  i tell them that everything will be just fine but they don't have a good feeling about the flight and really don't want me to go.  i wish they could come with...we would have so much fun with all of us together!

my best friend 'Nae is the best woman i know.  She is kind, generous, loving, giving, so supportive and so fun to be around.  i love you, 'Nae!

we have been best friends since the 4th grade!  we met at church and have been very close for a long time...

this will be the first time i have traveled this far in the U.S....

i love traveling! 

i love seeing new places and beautiful scenery - especially places with waterfalls...and there are many places in Europe i'd love to explore (i want to spend some time in Paris most of all!)

maybe one day....

i just want to say thank You, Father, for this opportunity to travel and be with my beloved best friend...please bless our fellowship together and the precious time we have with one another...i love you, Father.....Your daughter, lil ole me...

thanks everyone for stopping by and may God bless you all!

Ever thine...

 

for those of us who love someone and are loved in return -
measure for measure,
we can call ourselves blessed...

for those of us who love someone who does not love us back -
if we've truly given of ourselves,
we can live without regret...

and for those of us who love only ourselves -
in the end,
we are the lonely ones...

for myself,
i'd rather love with all my heart and be turned away -
than never take the risk at all...

a little change of plans!

so it's that time of year again - when I'm officially a little older. 

my children and i were going to see Seattle again like we usually do around my birthday...but...we went to Leavenworth instead!

I've never seen it and just before we left we decided to see a place I've never been to!

It's a completely charming town with friendly faces everywhere we went...we found a shop that's just for and about Christmas and I got some beautiful sparklies from there for my b-day!

My children truly spoil me for my birthday and each year I am both grateful and amazed for all they do to make my day special! 

I do have a special birthday wish that hasn't yet come true...I wish to ride in a hot-air balloon...it would be like flying and I wish for it with all my silly heart :)        maybe someday...

a special thank you to my beautiful, amazing children who i could clearly never deserve!

and of course, to my amazing Father God, for making me feel loved and special on my birthday each and every year...i love You dearly...your soon to be older daughter, elaine ;)

the new year...

 I'd like to ring in the new year romantically :) ...a glass of something bubbly, Old Lang Syne playing in the background and a special kiss to remember...

That's not what usually happens, lol...

I celebrate the new year with my children and it is always special in a different way...so grateful for their love and companionship...I am so blessed to have these amazing children...soo blessed!

But the best thing about the new year is the fresh start it affords us...A clean slate and a time for new beginnings...putting the missteps behind us and standing up again to walk then to run...hoping to hit our stride in 2025.

I never make new years resolutions because i think they're too flimsy and fragile and easily broken.

instead i make prayer requests to the Father...asking for help to change the flaws in my character, to make me a better mom, daughter and friend.

I vow to value time as never before...never forgetting how brief this life is, I don't want to waste one more minute on the trivialities and distractions, rather, I want to appreciate all the people i love and spend my time wisely and give my love to those around me without reservation...spending each day as if it were my last...

time is short, our lives are fleeting so don't waste time today...tell the people you love that you love them, hug a friend or relative and let them know you care...give of your time and money to those in need while you can still make a difference in the people around you...strangers and friends alike.

I tell the people i love that i love them...I never forget to let them know...because i know how quickly we are here and then gone and what it truly means to cherish them each and every day...while we can...how about you?...is there someone you should call and simply say i love you...telling them how much they mean to you?

the clock is ticking and unstoppable so let's truly value one another and not be afraid to reach out...don't let these moments pass you by...

one of my absolute favorite songs is by Tim McGraw and it's called "Live Like You Were Dying"...I'll close this post with the lyrics to his song...feel free to press play to hear this song!  God bless each and everyone of you and thank you so much for stopping by!

He said
"I was in my early forties
With a lot of life before me
And a moment came that stopped me on a dime
I spent most of the next days
Looking at the x-rays
Talkin' 'bout the options
And talkin' 'bout sweet time"
I asked him
"When it sank in
That this might really be the real end
How's it hit you
When you get that kind of news?
Man, what'd you do?"

 

He said
"I went skydiving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying"
And he said
"Someday I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dying"

 

He said
"I was finally the husband
That most of the time I wasn't
And I became a friend a friend would like to have
And all of a sudden going fishin'
Wasn't such an imposition
And I went three times that year I lost my dad
I finally read the Good Book, and I
Took a good, long, hard look
At what I'd do if I could do it all again
And then

 

I went skydiving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying"
And he said
"Someday I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dying
Like tomorrow was a gift
And you've got eternity
To think about
What you'd do with it
What could you do with it
What did I do with it?
What would I do with it?

 

Skydiving
I went Rocky mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I watched an eagle as it was flying"
And he said
"Someday I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dying
To live like you were dying
To live like you were dying"

Christmas morn...

 It's Christmas morning and I'm wide awake while my children sleep soundly...

They're all grown now but they're here, tonight, ready to wake and open gifts and I am profoundly grateful that they are.

Last night, Christmas Eve, we all spent together at my son's, opening a few gifts, eating a lovely meal, playing card games with Christmas music playing softly in the background, laughing loudly and grateful just to be together.

The only missing piece was the snow...not a white lacey flake in sight and it truly disheartens me...I've grown up with a white Christmas every year...I took it for granted as a child but pray actively for it each year that passes by.

Someone i love recently told me that the snow was irrelevant...not a big deal...and that's okay for him - but it truly is to me...as it falls on the earth, it covers dirt and darkness leaving a beautiful elegant white blanket on the ground...and the world is lighter and brighter for it's falling...

did you know that snow falls at the end of almost every Christmas movie?  There's a good reason for that...it means the film, the family, the Christmas wishes and dreams are complete...the problems are resolved and the joy and peace of the season are there for all to enjoy...

I wonder what wishes and dreams are waiting in your heart this beautiful and amazing time of year?

What would make you feel complete and resolved and filled with joy?

Thank you, Father for just being who You are in our lives......with or without snow, I am truly grateful for all the people I love and care for.

You are the reason for the season and I pray You touch every heart and mind tonight...

revealing Your great Love and mercy for each of us as we lay dreaming of Christmas morn...

in the rain...

I'm off to Green Bluff this morning...it's a tradition with me and my beautiful and amazing daughters!

Each year we trudge on out in the early morning hours to visit the different farms and pick out pumpkins we carve together....

blessings i am eternally grateful for 

and even better......this year it will be raining on our little adventure!  

for me, the rain makes everything better.......

it takes an average day and makes it magical...the mesmerizing sound of windshield wipers back and forth, the reflected lights of cars in puddles nearby...for me, the very definition of cozy.

and i am happy and thankful for all of this..........thankful for the steaming cup of coffee in my hand as I watch the rain from my living room window......

thank You, Father for these yearly moments with my children...for these rainy moments of warmth and coziness...

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." *James 1:17*

this time...

I've been very ill for about the last 5-6 days...just today i've started to feel like myself again...

Thank You Father, for my amazing and understanding children! they have been there for me every step of the way...(though I missed both Silverwood and Lord of the Rings with them).

And thank You Father for healing me bit by bit and day by day...

many years later...

 I'm so happy to post again...it's been too long and the journey filled with blessings and heartache but i've missed this blog and sharing what the Lord has done in my life and those closest to me...

I wonder how your journey has been...what lessons you've learned and taught the others in your lives and all the moments in between...

i will post again soon and may God bless you for stopping by!

and then there was Graham....

today was a bit rough...trying to get answers...so many phone calls...so little help.

and then there was Graham...a wonderful man who i didn't meet until today...just a few moments ago...and he changed everything.

just a few kind words when i was in tears...and it made such a difference to me!

so here's my thank you, Graham....may God bless you always :)

Happy 4th of July!!

i'm so excited for the 4th of July!!
we bbq all day, light our fireworks after sunset and just enjoy being with family and friends! 😊

it's a truly blessed day and i'm so thankful that i'll get to spend it with my children! 

we still buy sparklers and write our names in the air...(it never fails that my beautiful daughter Bronte' burns herself every single year!)

my all-time fav firework is the bees!!! they're the best!
and they're sort of scary because you never know where they'll end up!!

last year i lit one of the bees and i accidentally dropped it right in front of me and then i ran and Alexandra, my beautiful daughter, was walking towards me and i grabbed her and dragged her away!  even though we were at a safe distance, it whizzed right by my ear!...after i explained why i did that, we laughed and laughed, cuz that's the kind of thing that only ever happens to me, lol!!!

i thank our Father that i'm an American and i'm proud to celebrate our Independence Day!

so Happy 4th of July everyone
and God bless you for stopping by!!
:) 

grateful...

i'm grateful for the time i have with my children...

my daughter Alexandra and i have recently started to travel around locally, with the idea to find good food and make new memories!

so far Coeur d' Alene is my favorite because of the delicious food at Dockside Restaurant and the beautiful lake they have!

this weekend, Lord willing of course, we have our sights set on Otis Orchards and Liberty Lake!

it's so much fun to travel, even if it's all basically local :)

it's a change of scenery and i'm grateful for it and the chance to be with my children in a different way!

joining us will be my other beautiful daughter, Bronte' and her love, Courtney, and soon, Alexandra's best friend and my adopted daughter, Kia.

i would love to do this with my son, Roman, but he has very little free time as he is a chef in a Spokane restaurant!

just driving on the freeway, i am often surprised by the gorgeous colors of the sky and the little towns that seem fascinating to me :)

and the beauty always reminds me of our precious Father...the creator of every beautiful detail in nature...His vision...and i am grateful to share in all the splendor He has made for us!

it's easy to get bored and to stop appreciating the wonderful moments we have with those we love...to stop looking up and around...to stop being grateful...

have you stopped looking around, stopped appreciating what and who you have?

you can always start again and it's easy to do!

just remember the child in you...
remember the wonder...
open your heart again and remember who has made it all!

we praise and thank You, our forgiving and tender-hearted Father, for all the wondrous things You have done and all the wondrous things You will do today, tomorrow and forever!

God bless you for stopping by!!

:)

I am not there...

last night i was watching one of my favorite shows and i heard this poem...
it just really touched my heart...
it's written by Mary Elizabeth Frye.

"Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die."

from our beloved Father...

These words of God mean everything to me...

they're words of comfort and safety, both of which are in scarcity today.

Thank You, Father for always knowing when and what to say to Your children...

i love and need You more each passing day...

"Because he loves me," says the Lord, "I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
He will call on me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation."

your lainey

edict for the recovering rager...

I've been memorizing some beautiful and practical scripture...this is awesome!!

"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, along with every form of malice. 
Be kind and compassionate with one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ
God forgave you."

*Ephesians 4: 31-32*
  NIV

what dreams may come...

dearest child of mine,

may you meet the man destined to become your husband...

a man whose greatest wish is make your dreams come true...

a man who loves God with all his heart and soul and is then teachable by the Holy Spirit in how to love you and the children you will one day have...

a man who is strong without being cruel
forthright without being domineering.

the spiritual 'head of the household' and only does this under the lordship of Jesus Christ...

a man who would no sooner hurt you than hurt himself.

a man who understands completely what sacrificial love is, does and costs.

a man who listens to what you say and what you don't say, are afraid to say, dare not say.

a man who is your humanly "safe place", while you journey together in this life.

a man who doesn't just see you, but rather, he sees through you, with the loving and uncondemning eyes of Christ.

a man who will never leave, give up on or abandon you, regardless of the circumstances.

a man who will never attempt to replace you with another.

a man who can't forget you, who will always love you...no matter how much time or distance has come to pass...

who will fight for you with every breath he has...
who will 'fight tigers for you'...

and lastly, please know you can believe, dream of and always reach for true love...
it exists because God, our beloved Father does.
and because He is Love.

this is my prayer for you, dearest child of mine...

with all I am and ever hope to be,

your Mama-muu...

"What Kind of Man?" - Matthew 8:26-27 (ERV)

"Jesus answered, "Why are you afraid? You don't have enough faith." Then Jesus stood and gave a command to the wind and the waves. The wind stopped, and the lake became very calm. The men were amazed. They said, "What kind of man is this? Even the wind and the water obey him!"

Key Thought:

There is nothing that can stand in the way of Jesus. 

No enemy has the power -- he simply casts out the demons. 
No teacher or skeptic can stump him with a question. 
No disease can withstand his call for healing. 
Not even nature can baffle or threaten him. 
He is not just a man. 
He is God's Son. 
He is Immanuel, God with us. 
But until we can fully understand who he is, we can be secure that he will care for us and bring us to his home!
Fear is not just being troubled with circumstances;
it also is the uncertainty about what will ultimately happen to us. 
Jesus shows his disciples that their safety, their destiny,
is under his command and nothing can withstand his grace offered to bless his disciples.

Today's Prayer:

My God, Almighty Lord, please act with your strong power to still the storm in the hearts of those I love. 

Give them peace and calm and lead them to know that Jesus is not only their source of help,
but that he is so much more than a mere mortal man. 
In the name of Jesus my Lord I pray. 
Amen.

(this original devotion, by Phil Ware, can be found at www.heartlight.org)

"Love above Knowledge" — 1 Corinthians 8:1-13

Dear Father, the one real and only God,

Give me more love and humility than knowledge, for "Knowledge puffs up but love builds up."

People know lots of things, but they let it go to their heads. 
Help me, Father, never to imagine that I know everything, because I know that I do not yet know as I ought to know. 
What I want is to love you as I should, for if I love you, then I am loved and known by you. 
All the things that men and women pursue, O God, seem to have no real existence when compared to you. 
There is no God but you, the one God.

The world is full of "gods."
But for us Christians there is just one God, you, from whom all things come and for whom they exist, and there is just one Lord, the Lord Jesus Christ, through whom are all things and through whom we exist.

In the name of Jesus and by his authority I ask these things according to his will. 
Amen.

(this original devotion, by Eldon Degge, can be found at www.heartlight.org)

what His peace does...

"...present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4:6-7

Thought

What guards your heart?

What protects your mind?
Did you know that the peace of God can stand guard over our hearts and minds?
That's the apostle Paul's promise to us in this passage. 
If we will present our requests to God, with thanksgiving, then God's peace
that is greater than any explanation and that transcends our ability to comprehend it, will stand sentry over our hearts and minds. 
You want an example of how this is true?
Look at the book of Job. 
All that befalls him. 
All that wounds him. 
Yet still he doesn't become hard of heart or go insane. 
What is the key to his survival?
His ongoing conversation with the LORD.
He will not relinquish that relationship no matter how badly he hurts,
how much he is confused, nor how badly he is ridiculed.

Prayer

Father, I need your peace. 

There are wounds that pierce my heart,
but I don't want it to become hardened and callused. 
There are times my mind is so confused that I fear I may lose my rationality. Dear Father, I trust that as I cling to Jesus, and as I speak openly with you about my life and your grace, that you will bless me with your peace and will protect my heart and my mind from destruction. 
Thank you, dear Father, for the reminder that even as I struggle with my troubles, I also need to give you thanks for all the good things that you have blessed me with in my life and my walk with you!
In Jesus' name I pray. 
Amen.

(this original devotion is from http://www.heartlight.org)

Jonah...

i love Jonah...i really do...
(he and peter are my favorite 2 men in the Bible!)

i love him because i can relate to him...
at times he's a real chicken, proud, stubborn, self-pitying and completely ridiculous!

God comes to jonah and gives him a task to do.
He wants jonah to go and warn the ninevites to repent, to turn from their evil ways.

instead of going to nineveh, he tries to run away from God...
this is so funny to me, i gotta say - trying to run away and hide from God!!

you see, jonah, the israelite, was sworn enemies with the ninevites and had no wish to warn them to repent...he didn't want them to be saved and he sure as shooting didn't want to be the messenger!

so this silly man tried to run away from God...
have you ever done that?
knew what our Father wanted of you...knew what the right path was, but you just turned away and did your own thing and went your own way?

i get Jonah...i totally do...i've been just like him...

stubborn, self-pitying, arrogant and rebellious...

so let me save you some time and effort...
you can never truly run away from God...
it can't be done...
ever.

you can ignore Him...
resist Him...
deliberately do the opposite of what He's asking you to do...
but you can't outrun or hide from Him...

and when we stop running, when our knees buckle and we're struggling for breath, if we just look up, we can see His hand outstretched towards us and after we put our hand in His, we'll wonder why we were ever running to begin with...

as always, please feel free to email me with any questions or comments:
laineyrose7@yahoo.com.

God bless to all!!

this one's for you, Ernzy...

i don't really know why there are days when it feels as if Nattie just told me you were gone, Ernzy...

why the pain feels brand new and i'm drowning in it...

why listening to your favorite song by Neil Diamond makes me feel as if you're in the room with me...
or the last time you sang it to me...
"love on the rocks"...
it's a perfect song for you, my Ernzy...

there's an actor that starred on SVU once...
he looks just like you, Ernzy...and this year it hurt just to look at him.

i really need you to come back to me, Ernzy...i know you can't...but there's stuff on this planet that doesn't make sense without you.

and our good memories are choking my heart today and i want to visit you, but i haven't been back since the memorial/burial.
not once, Ernzy and i need you to know that it isn't because i don't want to...i just can't go there...i can't do it...

i love you so much, Ernzy, so very very very much...

i know we'll see each other again when i go Home - but until then, beloved brother of mine, please know this song's for you...for today...for all the yesterdays we had together...and for all the tomorrow's we will have in Heaven.

your Lainey forever and ever and ever. . .

ever thine...

for those of us who love someone and are loved in return -
measure for measure,
we can call ourselves blessed...

for those of us who love someone who does not love us back -
if we've truly given of ourselves,
we can live without regret...

and for those of us who love only ourselves -
in the end,
we are the lonely ones...

for myself,
i'd rather love with all my heart and be turned away -
than never take the risk at all...

Happy Valentine's day to us all!

Mercy...how dearly we need this each day!

"What great blessings there are for the people that give mercy to other people! Mercy will be given to them." — Matthew 5:7 (ERV)

Key Thought:

God has treated us much, much better than we deserve. 
That fundamental, undergirding spiritual truth is the reality of grace. 
He has seen us in our sin and had mercy on us because of his great love for us (see Rom. 5:6-11). 
Even though we have repeatedly proved unfaithful and undependable, both individually and as a group, God has been gracious and merciful. 
He has repeatedly offered forgiveness, help, redemption, and salvation when we least deserved it. 
Rather than dealing with us strictly as law would demand, God has dealt with us as a loving father does with his children.
This conditioning reality must show up in us. 
How can we claim to be his children and not be merciful?
How can we call for retribution against our brothers and sisters, when fairness would demand we pay a great penalty for our sin?
In the Kingdom Family, mercy rules. 
When that mercy is forgotten by us, then God has promised to use our standard of mercilessness when he judges us. 
Yet as long as we are merciful to others, God will show us mercy.

Today's Prayer:

Holy and righteous Father, I confess that I often want justice when I am violated and mercy when I sin. 
Thank you for not treating me as I deserve, but instead providing Jesus to be the atoning sacrifice that extends your mercy to me and fulfills your justice on my behalf. 
Soften my heart that I may reflect your grace and mercy in my dealings with those who have injured me. 
In the precious name of Jesus I pray. 
Amen.

(the original devotion can be found at www.heartlight.org)

"kiss Your feet"...by Delirious

(this is the music playing in the background...
it breaks my heart for God and lifts me up at the same time...
let's listen together...)

"kiss Your feet"

all i have in this world
is more than a king could ever wish for
all these crowns leave me cold
for i was born to kiss Your feet

all i have in this life
is all for a King, you know i live for
and Your crown bears my name
for i was born to give You praise

isn't He beautiful
isn't He beautiful
isn't He beautiful

take this life, take it all
i'm breathing the dirt, but i have clean hands
so i'll run with my boots on
for i was born to give You fame

isn't He beautiful
isn't He beautiful
isn't He beautiful


yes, You are beautiful
yes, You are beautiful
isn't He beautiful


yes, You are beautiful
yes, You are beautiful
yes, You are beautiful
isn't He beautiful. 

though these are not my words - they are my heart's cry and everything i want to be...

dear Father,

Help me to have respect for rulers and authorities, to be submissive and obedient.

Help me to be ready for any honest work, and to speak evil of no one.

Help me to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy to every one.

Help me not to be foolish, disobedient, or led astray.

Help me not to be a slave to various passions and pleasures,

or to pass my days in malice or envy, hating others or being hated by them.

In the name of Jesus,
the all-wise and blessed Savior.

Amen


written by Eldon Degge
original post can be found at: www.heartlight.org

what i don't need to know...

"Hast thou entered into the springs of the sea?" — Job 38:16

 

Some things in nature must remain a mystery to the most intelligent and enterprising investigators.

Human knowledge has bounds beyond which it cannot pass.

Universal knowledge is for God alone.

If this be so in the things which are seen and temporal, I may rest assured
that it is even more so in matters spiritual and eternal.

Why, then, have I been torturing my brain with speculations as to destiny and will, fixed fate, and human responsibility?

These deep and dark truths I am no more able to comprehend
than to find out the depth which coucheth beneath, from which old ocean draws her watery stores.

Why am I so curious to know the reason of my Lord's providences, the motive of his actions, the design of his visitations?

Shall I ever be able to clasp the sun in my fist, and hold the universe in my palm?
yet these are as a drop of a bucket compared with the Lord my God.

Let me not strive to understand the infinite, but spend my strength in love. 

What I cannot gain by intellect I can possess by affection, and let that suffice me.

I cannot penetrate the heart of the sea, but I can enjoy the healthful breezes which sweep over its bosom, and I can sail over its blue waves with propitious winds.

If I could enter the springs of the sea, the feat would serve no useful purpose either to myself or to others, it would not save the sinking bark, or give back the drowned mariner to his weeping wife and children;

neither would my solving deep mysteries avail me a single whit, for the least love to God, and the simplest act of obedience to him, are better than the profoundest knowledge.

My Lord, I leave the infinite to thee, and pray thee to put far from me such a love for the tree of knowledge as might keep me from the tree of life.

written by Charles Spurgeon
original post can be found at:  www.heartlight.org

oh, to know and love the One who loves us best, first and always...

"I will; be thou clean." — Mark 1:41

 

Primeval darkness heard the Almighty fiat, "light be," and straightway light was,
and the word of the Lord Jesus is equal in majesty to that ancient word of power. Redemption like Creation has its word of might.
Jesus speaks and it is done.
Leprosy yielded to no human remedies,
but it fled at once at the Lord's "I will."
The disease exhibited no hopeful signs or tokens of recovery, nature contributed nothing to its own healing, but the unaided word effected the entire work on the spot and for ever.
The sinner is in a plight more miserable than the leper;
let him imitate his example and go to Jesus,
"beseeching him and kneeling down to him."
Let him exercise what little faith he has, even though it should go no further than "Lord, if thou wilt, thou canst make me clean";
and there need be no doubt as to the result of the application.
Jesus heals all who come, and casts out none.
In reading the narrative in which our morning's text occurs, it is worthy of
devout notice that Jesus touched the leper.
This unclean person had broken through the regulations of the ceremonial law
and pressed into the house, but Jesus so far from chiding him broke through the law himself in order to meet him.
He made an interchange with the leper, for while he cleansed him, he contracted by that touch a Levitical defilement.
Even so Jesus Christ was made sin for us, although in himself he knew no sin,
that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.
O that poor sinners would go to Jesus, believing in the power of his blessed substitutionary work, and they would soon learn the power of his gracious touch.
That hand which multiplied the loaves, which saved sinking Peter, which upholds afflicted saints, which crowns believers, that same hand will touch every seeking sinner, and in a moment make him clean.

The love of Jesus is the source of salvation.
He loves,
he looks,
he touches us,
WE LIVE.

by Charles Spurgeon
from the original post at www.heartlight.org

i surrender all...

(i woke up with this song in my heart...)

it is a very old song that was played almost every sunday in church.
at the end of the church service, there would be an altar call,
where the pastor asks everyone to close their eyes and raise their hand
if they'd like to ask Jesus into their heart,
and then asks all those who raised their hand to come forward, down to the altar,
where there would be someone who would lead them in prayer.
sometimes the altar call was for those of us who had
'forgotten their first Love'
and wanted to renew their intimate relationship with Jesus.

but, regardless of why we raised our hands,
regardless of how nerve-wracking it was to walk down the aisle
in front of everyone else,
regardless of how much easier it would be to just stay in your seat...
once you get there, once you reach the altar,
you never want to get back up again.
and you just can't believe how you lasted this long
without that precious relationship with our divine Brother, Jesus.
does this sound familiar?

did you walk away from Jesus to pursue another path?
when you're the only one still awake at night and you feel
a familiar ache in your heart of hearts, but you just can't place it,
do you feel regret for the choices you've made?

the thing is, if we've just met Jesus or if we desire to renew
our relationship with Him all over again,
He is right there at the door to your heart,
waiting for you to just open up.

no human being can ever fill that demanding void within us...
it belongs to the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords.
and if you've just met Him and asked Him into your heart to be
your Lord, Savior, Brother and closest Friend,
or you really want to but don't know how,
please feel free to email me at: laineyrose7@yahoo.com -
i would love to pray with you...

and if you already know Jesus but have walked away from Him,
please remember it is not too late to turn around...
He's right there, He's still right there,
He's always there...


I SURRENDER ALL
"All to Jesus I surrender
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him,
In his presence daily live.

I surrender all,
I surrender all;
All to thee,
my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Humbly at His feet I bow,
Worldly pleasures all forsaken,
Take me Jesus,
take me now.

I surrender all,
I surrender all;
All to thee,
my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

Lord I give to You
All I ever had
And everything I was
And everything I am
And now I lay it down
I lay it at Your feet
To Your grace
To Your power
I surrender all...
God i give myself to thee...
fill me with thy love and power...
let thy blessings fall on me...

I surrender all,
I surrender all;
All to thee,
my blessed Savior,
I surrender all...

All to thee,
my blessed Savior,
I surrender all..."

on bended knees...

Please, dear Father,

heal Your children...
heal the hurting
heal the broken
restore us unto You
re-build
renew
and refresh
we need You so desperately, dearest Father...
unite us
heal us
gather us together once again
'once for all'
wash our hearts
til they are white as snow
mend our broken bones
and broken spirits
help us see Your hand outstretched
help us drink from Your cup of cool water

and like this song -
help us surrender all
on bended knees
with humbled hearts
and listening ears

You, who is the only One who truly knows and loves us...
we freely admit that we can't live without You...

help us remember:

just as i am
refiners fire
upstairs prayers and Bible studies
sharing tears and triumphs
coffee and silly philosophy
kneeling before the Great I Am
keith green
worship-team
praising You, our One and greatest First Love
united, not divided
found not lost
hopeful not hopeless...

we love You, precious Father of us all...
we love You, dearest Brother Divine
we love You, blessed Holy Spirit

and in the end,
we belong to You all

we are Your children and we need You Father 
today, tomorrow and for always...

where He is...

Today, my morning devotional reminded me to do a lil self-inventory
and remember all the wonderful things God has done and been in my life...
to look back and remember all the prayer requests He has answered.

and I am thankful...
there have been many times that my prayer requests have been answered.
all sorts of requests as minute as helping me with my yard work all the way to
keeping my children safe and sound in His arms.

sometimes when we pray and pray over a particular request, and we don't see
any results, we can start to become embittered towards our Father.

we ask Him:

why won't You help me???
You can see what this means to me -
You can see my absolute heartache -
you can see my overwhelming weariness!

we want to yell into the vast silence:

WHERE ARE YOU, GOD ???

so, I write this for us all...

He is there...He is alive...and He loves you so very much!

our Father is honestly doing so many things
"behind the scenes"
that we simply cannot see or comprehend.

He is not sleeping, on a coffee-break or vacation.
He is not indifferent to your cries, pleas or heartache.
He feels everything you feel...your joys and sorrows both.
He has not forgotten you or any of your petitions before Him.

He is our Father...
Omnipotent, Omnipresent, and Omniscient.
(All-powerful), (All-present - yesterday, today and tomorrow) & (All-knowing).

He loves you.
you can trust Him, with your dreams, fears and your very life,
because all you are and ever will be,
lies within His all-capable hands.

He'll never turn His back on you.
He will always forgive you when you are repentant.
He will always protect you when you need protecting,
save you when you need saving
carry you when you need carrying
and encourage you when you need encouraging.

Whatever trial or circumstance you're going through right now,
please know your Father is right beside you every moment of every day...

because that's just who He is.

if you've given up...

I know there are children of God who have given up...
who've lost their way and lost their faith.
and who somehow have come to believe that God has lost his faith and given up on them.

i just want you to know that it's not true.
no matter where you are today or where you'll be tomorrow, He is still there with you...
wherever you may go.

please don't give up...

if you've come to Him and prayed and prayed over something or someone who's broken your heart -
and you've yet to see any results,
please know that any delay in answered prayer is only because His timing has to be extraordinarily precise.
He hasn't forgotten you, your prayers, your sorrows or your pain...

Let me say it again...
He hasn't forgotten you.

He loves you and will never leave or forsake you...
so, if you've 'had enough', walked away and are too weary to pray anymore...
that's okay, because He hasn't.

He's got strength enough for the both of you.
lean on Him, today and remember,
if you feel forsaken, forgotten and unseen
the proof of His enduring and everlasting love is right there for all to see and remember...

He watched His blameless, spotless, only begotten Son, die -
so that we might live in eternity with Him...

and He did that
                         just
                               for
                                    you...

When God Doesn't Make Sense...by Tim Archer

Naaman was an important man.
He was head of the army of one of the major world powers.
The Bible tells us that God had used him to win great victories for his king,
the king of Syria.

Naaman was brave.
Naaman was influential.
Naaman was very, very sick.

He had what the Bible calls leprosy.
This can mean any of a number of
skin conditions, not just Hansen's disease
(the scientific name for modern leprosy).

Leprosy was taken very seriously.
It was thought to be extremely contagious.
Because of this, people with leprosy lived isolated lives,
cut off from the rest of society.
For a public figure, this was especially tragic.

Then someone told Naaman that there was a prophet named Elisha
who could cure him of his illness.
Naaman traveled to the land of Israel to find this prophet and seek to be healed.

When Naaman arrived at Elisha's house, the prophet didn't come out to
greet his visitor.
Instead, he sent a servant to inform Naaman that he
was to submerge himself seven times in the Jordan River in order to be
healed.

Naaman was outraged!
Not only had the prophet not received him personally,
but the holy man had the gall to suggest that Naaman dirty
himself in the filthy waters of Israel.
If Naaman needed a bath, he could use one of Syria's mighty rivers.

Servants convinced the military man that he had nothing to lose by
trying what the prophet had told him.
Naaman swallowed his pride and went to the Jordan.
He went down one time, two times, three times...
and when he came up the seventh time, his skin was clear.
He was healed!
(You can read the whole story in the fifth chapter of 2 Kings)

I'm like Naaman at times.
God wants me to do what?
He wants me to go where?
That doesn't even make sense!

God's instructions don't always make sense.
Love my enemies?
Don't worry about tomorrow?
Eat bread and drink wine to remember His Son?
Submerge myself in water in order to be cleansed?

At some point, we have to decide who is going to rule our lives.
Will it be God?
Or will it be common sense?
Will God tell me what's right and wrong?
Or will logic be my guide?

Am I willing to have faith that God is good enough, wise enough and
powerful enough to do what's best for me?

Today I want to encourage you to trust God, to build your life around
Him, even when you can't understand every detail of what is going on.

Follow God, even when He doesn't make sense.

(Original post found at www.heartlight.org)

When you love someone...

When you love someone you'll do anything
You'll do all the crazy things that you can't explain
You'll shoot the moon, put out the sun
When you love someone...

You'll deny the truth, believe a lie
There'll be times that you'll believe
That you can really fly
But your lonely nights have just begun
When you love someone...

When you love someone you'll feel it deep inside
And nothin' else can ever change your mind
When you want someone, when you need someone
When you love someone...

When you love someone, you'll sacrifice
You'd give it everything you got and
You won't think twice
You'd risk it all, no matter what may come
When you love someone

You'll shoot the moon, put out the sun
When you love someone...

*originally recorded by bryan adams for the motion picture ~ "Hope Floats"*